When the Work Pays Off

“Shape yourself before the world shapes you.”

— Mahyar Mottahed

I was taking a morning stroll through my neighborhood last fall, my mind racing with chaotic thoughts surrounding my new life circumstances (which were equally chaotic), when I stopped for a moment to take a much-needed *deep breath*. As I stood there, feeling the warmth of the sunshine on my face, I opened my eyes and took in this massive tree towering over me and noticed something… It was adorned with several large nests that I had never noticed before. Fall had just made its way to us, so the tree had only very recently shed its leaves—of course I hadn’t noticed the nests. How could I?

As I continued to stand there gazing up at this now barren tree, I started to wonder how long it had taken the birds to build their nests. I imagined them scouring the nearby yards and fields, thoughtfully selecting every twig and crafting them with the greatest care and intentionality. All that preparation being done under the cover and protection of the spring leaves and blooms with no one able to witness it. All that hard work in anticipation of the moment when it would finally be needed. And then I realized…

Here I was, facing one of the most world-rocking seasons of my life, and…managing it. Not perfectly, of course, but pretty damn well. I thought about everything that had been thrown my way these past few months like a never-ending hurricane, and I was surviving and—dare I say—thriving? That’s when I made the connection…like the birds, I, too, had been putting in the work.

Four years ago I made one of the greatest decisions of my life—I started therapy. When I made that decision, it wasn’t because something tragic had just happened or I had suffered a mental breakdown (not yet, anyway). I went because I knew I didn’t have all the tips and tools to help me navigate this world when things inevitably get hard. For four years I put in the work. I showed up for myself. I dug deep and grew up and stretched beyond (what I thought were) my limits. I was intentional. I had taken so much care in my own preparation, and now in this wintry season, I was casting off my metaphorical leaves and bringing to light all the hard work I had been diligently and privately doing that had equipped me for this moment. The work was paying off.

In life, the universe gives and the universe takes away. I know I’m not special in that way. None of us escape this life without pain or trauma or hardship. But just as that doesn’t make life any less beautiful, it also doesn’t mean it has to be so arduous. We can put in the work to ease those tough moments and challenging seasons—I’m proof of that.

So if you aren’t doing so already, I hope you take this as an encouragement to do something for your present self that your future self will thank you for. It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture or done with an audience, because it’s not for anyone else. It’s for you—and you deserve that. Be intentional. Take care. Build something so strong that it will be able to withstand any stress or storm or season. Know that the fruits of your labor will be so very worth it…and I cannot wait to see the magnificent “nest” you build.